Betapa Hatiku

I can't find a good video for this particular song, which is unfortunate.
I sang "Betapa Hatiku" at the reception of my first communion. I didn't volunteer to sing, my mother told me that I would do it. What mother said, it needed to be done.
I don't remember how many days I spent practicing with my piano teacher. I remember one of the evenings we had practice. I was being bad & I didn't feel like singing. In my head I thought "I know the song already, stop making me singing!" Anyways, I think mother had to apologize to my piano teacher for my behavior.
I wrote myself a cheat sheet of the lyric, just incase I forgot the words. I folded the paper and held it in my hand the entire time I sang. I didn't even have to peek at the paper, I got the lyric stamped on my brain. Anyways, I think i did pretty good.
"Betapa Hatiku" is one of my favorite songs. Of course when I was little I really didn't care about the meaning. Now that I do, I am glad that this beautiful song was written. I don't have a better word to thank the Lord, who loves me unconditionally.
Betapa hatiku

Betapa hatiku berterimakasih Yesus
Kau mengasihiku Kau memilikiku
Hanya ini Tuhan persembahanku
Segenap hidupku jiwa dan ragaku
Sbab tak kumiliki harta kekayaan
Yang cukup berarti tuk ku persembahkan
Hanya ini Tuhan permohonanku
Terimalah Tuhan persembahanku
Pakailah hidupku sebagai alatMu
Seumur hidupku
Lord Jesus, I thank you
With my whole life and soul, I do
My heart belongs to you
I know you love me true
The only sacrifice I can bring is my soul,
My body and my heart
You can make me whole
My riches are like rags,
Compared to you my Lord
My works are not enough,
The ones I could afford.
So, take my heart o Lord, I offer it to You,
Tell me now my Lord, what You want me to do
Receive it all my Lord, this body that was mine
until the end of time.
*So that was the English version of the song I found in Internet.

Dear Father,
I thank You for all the wonderful things You've given me. At times I feel selfish by asking You for more. Please forgive me. Help me to be a better person, to love You more by loving others. I pray for peace within me, so I may bring peace to others.
Father, all I am asking tonight is a peaceful night. Surround us all with respect and understanding, so we may close our eyes without worries.
Father, you are my rock, my foundation. Hold me tight so I won't lost, as I have before and I didn't like it one bit. Help me to love you more, because my life depends on you.

Anak Domba Allah

One of the songs that are sung during mass is Anak Domba Allah, or Lamb of God.

"Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world. Have mercy on us, mercy on us." 2x

"Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world. Grant us peace, grant us peace."

Father,

Please send your angel tonight to be with us. Please send a bucket full of peace for us.

Your presence is all we need to keep us safe in the dark night.

Amen.

Ndherek Dewi Maria (Jakarta Cathedral Choir)

"Nderek Dewi Maria" was my grandma's favorite song. Grandma passed away when I was either in 3rd or 4th grade. I still remember the morning my uncle came to tell my dad that his mom just passed. I didn't get to know grandma K very well, mainly because dad is her 10th kid, and she didn't have the energy to entertain her younger grandchildren.....

I heard stories about grandma K. Good stories. She devoted hours to pray to Virgin Mary. In fact, everyone received rosary as a gift the day we put her to rest.

"Ndherek Dewi Maria" is one of my mom's favorite song. I wonder if she grew to love the song because of grandma K. It seemed like my dad and his siblings would sing the song at least once whenever they had family reunions.

The song is in Javanese. Although I took Javanese language up till middle school, I was never good at it. I had to find the English translation from the Internet. I hope this is close to the original meaning of the song.

The last time I heard this song live was during Christmas eve mass. If I am not mistaken, a Father played the song with his flute. It was beautiful. I heard my parents sang. I am surprised not all of the congregation knew the song.

I found the song on youtube yesterday, and have played it for 100 times. Something about the song calms me down.

so this little voice inside me wants to say....

dear mother Mary,

would you pass this message to your Holy Son.

I am asking for forgiveness, for what I have done wrong,

To him, to my family and to my friends.

Would you ask Him too that I really-really need Him?

I am longing for peace inside me.

I am longing for help.

I have been waiting for direction, for a change,

Would you ask him how long I have to wait?

Mother Mary,

Will you wait with me? I need someone to assure me, that everything will turn better.

Did you know about the place I'd love to live in?

It's killing me that it won't be mine anytime soon.

Stay with me, while I am waiting for your son.

Stay with me, lullaby me with Hail Mary.

As the Deer longs for running streams (Bob Hurd)

Everyone has something they hold on to for strength. Some days I feel like I can conquer the world. Some days I don't. Sometimes I feel exhausted and overwhelmed with the load of life. I do not want to be a whiny person, but it's tough just to say God will provide, when I see no changes.

I know there is God. He has given me life. I am running to You, I need You to be with me. I need You to bring peace inside me.